When Pain Turns To Rage

A3, Coal and pencil on paper

As human beings, we experience a wide range of emotions every day. Some emotions are positive, while others are negative. The emotions around being stepped on are complex, with pain being the primary feeling that is often followed by anger. 

My drawing depicting a girl getting stepped on is a powerful representation of these emotions. The image shows the girl lying on the ground, with her face contorted in pain. Her head is being crushed by the weight of someone else. 

The pain that the girl is experiencing is clear, but there is more to the image than just physical discomfort. The look on the girl’s face shows that she is frustrated, upset, and in pain with what has just happened to her. 

There are many reasons why someone might feel angry after being stepped on. Perhaps they feel violated, or maybe they are frustrated at their own vulnerability. Whatever the reason, the anger that comes after the pain is a natural response to being hurt. 

I hope that by capturing the pain and anger of being stepped on, I have created a powerful image that will resonate with many people. 

The experience of being stepped on over and over again had a significant impact on my emotional well-being. The feelings of frustration and anger that I experienced as a result of being constantly disregarded or disrespected led me to feel demotivated and disheartened. It was hard not to take it personally, and the more it happened, the more I started to question my own worth and abilities. And the more it happened, the more my anger grew. It was difficult not to let this resentment spill over into other aspects of my life. It was important for me to recognize the impact it was having on my well-being. 

As time went on, these negative feelings started to spill over into other aspects of my life. I found myself becoming increasingly irritable and easily frustrated with those around me, and I started to feel like I couldn’t trust anyone. This sense of mistrust and alienation was incredibly isolating, and it made it hard for me to form close relationships with others. 

For me, one of the main reasons for these intense negative feelings, has been the experience of serving as a young female in the army. The world has come far, but sexism and bullying still stands as a great issue. I would say that most people certainly do not see themselves as someone who excludes and judge others, but it happens. This is a painful experience for anyone. When you live with someone 24/7 it hits hard when you constantly feel overlooked and left out.  

The environment I was put into never fitted me. Loud testosterone boys pecking at everything that moved. Over time these feelings led to hopelessness and despair. Informing higher ranked people was something I thought would help, but over and over again it was proved that the “serious chats” being held in the team and for the troop never actually changed anything. We recently had a survey concerning just these topics. The results were shocking. A huge number of people, both men and women have felt the exact same painful emotions as me in this very profession. This is not good news, but it certainly makes me feel a whole lot less alone. 

Healing from Trauma and Moving Towards Forgiveness 

It is very important to acknowledge these feelings. In order to address these negative feelings, I had to start taking steps to assert my boundaries and stand up for myself. This meant learning to say “no” when I needed to and advocating for my own needs and desires. It’s not always easy, and I often have to confront uncomfortable situations, but over time, I find that standing up for myself helps me to regain a sense of control and self-worth. For me it’s been important to release my anger and frustration in healthier ways, such as through exercise or creative outlets. 

Overall, the experience of being stepped on repeatedly had a profound impact on my emotional well-being, but by learning to assert myself and set boundaries, I’m working on moving past these negative feelings and start to rebuild my sense of self-confidence and trust in others. Healing is a process, and it takes time and effort to move forward. 


1 Comment

  1. Perhaps like the analogy of the pendulum has swung to the other side we can see how for women through the last few generations things went fully toward supposed liberation or freedom from centuries old stereotypical images or roles and duties for women, to like the Army slogan states; “be all you can be!” To now where I just read how many women since the Covid madness have decided that “traditional values and lifestyle” or roles of old times are very good ones, but, of course those women are getting a lot of flak saying such a thing by other women and men!

    We live in a very troubled, conflicted and far from perfect world, but I do believe the old adage of, “if its not broke don’t fix it” and what worked so well for thousands of years as traditional family as well as societal practices wasn’t a bad thing at all, but like anything I’m sure some tweaking or mild improving could have and should have been made! The problem has been a going against the grain and radically tearing it all up then trying to come up with a better plan, which I think has caused more trouble than it was worth, that ultimately did hurt multitudes of women and even many men in the process! In the end we have a more confused and conflicted society that is really becoming a sort of madhouse where anything goes, and it’s supposed to be embraced as fine when it is not at all!


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